


There's No Autocorrect in Real Life

by condescvnding



Series: Shadowhunters AU [1]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, M/M, Multi, Mundane Raphael Santiago, Mundane Simon Lewis, a bashful yet adorable simon, a very confused raphael, clary and izzy are adorable as usual pls, jace has terrible advice for simon, magnus and alec will teach raphael what it means to have feelings for someone
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-29
Updated: 2017-08-04
Packaged: 2018-12-08 10:15:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,282
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11644446
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/condescvnding/pseuds/condescvnding
Summary: Raphael comes to the local coffee shop, almost everyday. He's basically the daily customer. Nobody bothers him, nobody messes with him. However, when he realizes that his name is repeatedly spelled wrong on his cup day after day, he decides enough is enough.





	1. Raphael with an F?

**Author's Note:**

> The coffee shop's atmosphere was quiet, warm, and most definitely friendly. Many people of different shades, attitudes, and frustrations went in and out of the door but that's what made the experience even better. At least, that's what Raphael thought. Although, he would never tell anyone that. He was a daily customer, coming in and ordering his coffee jet black, with no sugar. However, it became a daily habit as well that the person behind the counter, continued to butcher his name.
> 
> (you keep messing up my name no matter how many times i spell it AU)

The coffee shop's atmosphere was quiet, warm, and most definitely friendly. Many people of different shades, attitudes, and frustrations went in and out of the door but that's what made the experience even better. At least, that's what Raphael thought. Although, he would never tell anyone that. He was a daily customer, coming in and ordering his coffee jet black, with no sugar. However, it became a daily habit as well that the person behind the counter, continued to butcher his name.

Raphael sighed as he stared at the cup. "Rafael. With an F? How the hell does he get PH mixed up with an F?", he muttered to himself, looking over at the cashier. Simon. He had seen his name tag many times before, not to mention his face. He always found it strange how Simon would automatically flush as soon as he approached the counter. Not to mention, he would always blabber on whenever he tried to make conversation. What was that about?He shrugged it off however, too busy focusing on the spelling of his name.

"R.. a.. f..", his eyebrows were furrowed. How hard was it to spell Raphael correctly? This wasn't the worst though. It definitely couldn't have beaten Rapheale. He felt slightly embarrassed with himself, getting so worked up over the spelling of a word but he had told them repeatedly how to spell it right. He looked up from his coffee cup only to see Simon staring right back at him. Was he trying to hide a smile? What the hell?

Raphael's eyes narrowed as he looked at him. "Simon? Simon? Simon!", a much smaller girl, with bright, fiery hair called behind him. "We have orders to take, alright? You can have eye sex with Dark and Mysterious later.", she told him, patting his back. Simon's cheeks immediately grew red, causing him to turn away from Raphael. Dark and Mysterious? Does she mean Raphael? If he liked him so much, why the hell was he spelling his name wrong?

Raphael frowned and stood up, grabbing his cup. He moved past the people in line and put his cup on the table. He rang the bell and up came the girl. He looked to her name tag and then back to her. "Hello, Clary. Can I uh.. speak to your co-worker? Simon?", he asked, looking from the girl and towards Simon who was seriously terrible at pretending to not listen.  


Clary sighed and nodded, moving to grab Simon before moving the line to the next register. Simon stood behind the counter, fidgeting with his fingers. He pushed his glasses up his nose, even though they were as far as they could go. Saying he was nervous was an understatement. "Simon.", Raphael put his hands flat on the counter. "Uh.. y-yes? Is there something I can help you with?", he asked, his voice slightly shaky.

"Yes, actually.", he turned the cup around and pointed at his name. "What does that say?", he asked, raising a brow. Simon looked at the cup and then back to him and then back to the cup once again. "R.. Rafael. It says your name. Why? Is that not your name? Are you going by a secret alias or something because you're secretly a secret agent? Maybe that's why you're so mysterious. Why else would you worry about a name? I mean, I could have just spelled it wrong or something but I doubt it, I listen to you thoroughly every time you t-", Raphael put a hand up and sighed. "Stop talking, please. That.. is not my name. My name is Raphael. R-A-P-H-A-E-L. You spelled it with an F."

Simon's face went red and he tapped his nails against the counter. "I-I did? I.. I listen to you every time, that can't be right.", he muttered to himself. "Well, clearly not hard enough. You've been doing this a lot recently. But what confuses me is that I spell it out for you every single time. So, please tell me what the problem is.", Raphael spoke, crossing his arms.

Simon's cheeks flushed a bright red. He took a deep breath and only shrugged before looking to Raphael. "I.. I can make it up to you. I can.. I can spend my break with you. I have 30 minutes so.. I have plenty of time to make it up to you. I've already had my break for today but.. whenever you come in, you can have a free coffee and I'll promise to spell your name right. I'll have time to fully apologize and help compensate for your time.", Simon pleaded, his cheeks looking a little pink.

Raphael raised a brow. Spend break with him? He wouldn't say no if it meant his name would be spelled correctly every time he entered. Not to mention, who could turn down free coffee? Raphael took a deep breath and nodded. "That sounds like a nice idea. Just.. let me know.", he took his cup and gave him a small wave. Simon beamed back with a huge smile, waving him off.

Raphael made his way back to this table and grabbed his book and computer, holding it under his arm before exiting the shop. Who could ever turn down free coffee?


	2. Ball of Confusion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in this one, we all realize just how excited clary (and izzy) are for simon to make a move on "dark and mysterious", better known as raphael, who simon terribly attempts to label as "nothing". not to mention, raphael lives with magnus and alec and has terrible ways of hiding his inner anger. please enjoy <3

As Clary approached the entrance of the coffee shop, she sighed. She flipped the sign to "Closed, Come back later!" and walked to Simon who was busy cleaning off the tables. Simon had always been serious about keeping the coffee shop in perfect condition, not wanting any trouble from Luke, their boss. He was focused, almost too focused to hear Clary trying to get his attention. "Simon? Simon? Simon!", she began to snap towards him.

He snapped up, looking at her with wide eyes. "Yeah?", he asked, dropping the cleaning towel from his hand. "Do you want to explain what happened with Dark and Mysterious today or shall we pretend like that just.. never happened?", she asked, crossing her arms with a smirk on her face. She had heard so much about how Simon gushed over the frequent costumer. So much that she had even went so far as to gossip with her girlfriend, Isabelle, about the situation. 

Simon's face went red and he looked down to his hands. "It.. It was nothing. Let's just say.. he's definitely smarter than I thought.", he explained to her, nodding and attempting to move past her. Clary moved to stand in front of him, holding a hand out. "No, no, no. You finally get the guts to approach him, let alone even look him in the eye for longer than 5 seconds and all I get is 'It was nothing'?", she began to sniffle, turning from him and covering her face. "I thought we were closer than that, Simon.. I really thought we were. Now.. I can't even trust you to tell me about your encounters with other boys..", she began to fake sob, keeping her back turned.

Simon rolled his eyes. "Clary, this never works and you know it."

Clary looked up with a frown. "It was worth a shot, okay?! Please just tell me, Simon!", she grabbed his arm and hopped up and down excitedly. Simon groaned and moved to a freshly cleaned table, pulling a chair out for her. "Fiiiiine. Sit.", he told her, which caused a rather triumphant smile to grow across her features. Clary took a seat and playfully put her chin in her hands, looking to Simon.  
Simon shook his head and rubbed his face. "I really don't know why you wanna hear about it so badly! He just.. wanted to know about the weather. That's all.", he lied, shrugging. Clary narrowed her eyes and shook her head. "Simon, you make me tell you everything about Isabelle and I. So, it'll only be fair if you give me details on what happened with your boy.", she told him, leaving Simon defeated. He sighed and put his hand over his face. "Fine. He.. Well, I've been spelling his name wrong purposely every day. Just.. to get his attention, really. I didn't think he would even approach me the way he did. But, he pointed it out to me and I immediately was taken by surprise. He told me how to spell his name letter by letter and I..", he trailed off, looking down.

Clary raised a brow. "You..?"

"I.. offered to spend my break with him. Just.. to compensate, not to like.. get to know him better or anything.", he scoffed, fiddling with his fingers. Clary picked up her phone and put it to her ear. 

"Did you hear that, Izzy?", she asked, having apparently been on the phone with her girlfriend the whole time.

Simon's eyes went wide. "Are you serious, Clary? You were on the phone with Izzy the whole time?", he asked, immediately embarrassed. "What? She wanted to know! You know I can barely say no to her.", she moved to put Isabelle on speaker. "Hi, Si! Listen, I wanted you to know that you did the right thing. Always start slow. Reel him in good and see where it takes you.", Isabelle explained to him, causing Simon to groan. He stood up and began to put the cleaning utensils away. "Whatever, Isabelle! C'mon, Clary. I'll drop you off.", Simon moved to grab his keys and awaited Clary to follow.  
"I'll be home soon, Iz. Love you.", she spoke to her girlfriend, hanging up and grabbing her things. They both left the shop and made their way to their separate apartments.

_On the other side of town.._

Raphael walked into his shared apartment, or as Magnus would call it "a lair", with a grunt. He set down his things and moved to his room to change. He fixed himself into more comfortable clothes with his eyebrows scrunched. Magnus leaned against the counter, glass of white wine in hand, raising a brow. "Alexander.. He's doing it. He's.. sulking.", Magnus put a hand on his chest.

Alec looked towards Raphael and rolled his eyes. "I wonder what minuscule thing pissed him off today..", he scoffed before grabbing a sponge from the sink and throwing it Raphael's way. "Can you leave the negative energy at the door? I feel it radiating and I'm all the way over here.", Alec asked him, causing Raphael to lift his hand to give him the finger.

"Whoa.. Now, he's using finger gestures. It must be big.", Magnus noticed, only giving Raphael reason to sigh and stand. "I'm fine. I don't know what you guys are talking about. I've actually never been better.", Raphael reassured them, crossing his arms.

Alec raised a brow and Magnus began to count down from five. Once he reached one, Raphael threw up his hands. "I just don't understand how hard it is for that barista down at the coffee shop to spell my name. My name isn't that difficult to spell, nor is it that difficult to announce. Shouldn't he at least understand what I'm saying to him? How the hell does he get an F from a PH?! I'm a nice... well... sometimes, I'm a nice guy and I tried my hardest to be patient today. I really did. So patient that I deserve an award! An Oscar, even.", Raphael vented, causing Alec's eyes to roll so hard, he could have pulled something.

Magnus moved to Raphael and grabbed his shoulders. "Raphael! Raphael! Focus. First, you need to slow down. Two, you need to explain what happened." Raphael sighed and nodded, focusing on Magnus.

It didn't take him long to explain to Magnus and Alec, who clearly looked displeased with the whole situation, how Simon had 'mistreated him'. However, Magnus had a tiny smirk on his face as he sat on Alec's lap. He sipped at his wine, which was almost done with to his dismay. He set his glass down and put his hands up. "Stop. What I suggest is, is that you take him seriously. It sounds like.. he really wants to make this up to you. So, give him a shot, you never know what could come out of it.", Magnus told him, shrugging.

"I personally think you should build a bridge and get over it.", Alec muttered but kept his hands wrapped around Magnus' waist. Raphael only shook his head. "Yeah, well, what if me giving him a shot ends up being even worse than what I started with? I'm okay with free coffee but all I want is for him to spell my name right.", Raphael chewed his lip, running his fingers through his hair. 

"And he just might. I suggest spending the time with him. You might actually come home with a smile on your face for once.", Magnus told him, playfully winking before standing up and finishing off his wine. He grabbed Alec's hand and pulled him to his feet. "Seriously, Raph. Think about it.", he told him one last time before leading Alec to the bedroom.

Raphael sighed and laid back on the couch he sat on, looking up at the ceiling. _Fine. Not just for the free coffee but to actually spend time with the guy who continuously spells my name wrong. Awesome. Good job, Raphael._


	3. Wow, You're Even Prettier Up Close

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> simon and raphael share laughs and have a splendid time with one another. however, what could raphael be hiding? a lover? a family emergency? alec and magnus set the apartment on fire once again and he has to come home to promise the neighbors it won't happen again for the 20th time that month? who knows?

Simon stood nervous as his break approached. Why the hell did he think it was a good idea to suggest hanging out with Raphael when he could barely talk to him? Damn his big mouth. He stood with a tray in hand and was nudged by Clary. "C'mon, Si. You're gonna be fine. Just serve this last order and wait for him to show up.", Clary reassured, causing Simon to take a deep breath and head out to give the orders to the customers.

He heard the bell ring against the door once it opened but was too busy serving to turn around and see who it was. He thanked the customers for their time and went to turn around but was bumped back to the ground. The person in front of him grunted and frowned. "We're already off to a great start, I see.", the person told him. Simon recognized that voice from anywhere.

He looked up at Raphael who was staring down at him and clearly wasn't going to offer to help him up. Standing up quickly, he dusted himself off. "Raphael! I-I'm uh.. I'm sorry. It was accidental, you know. Bumping into you. I'm sure you know that, I don't know why I even mentioned it. But, if you didn't, you know, there's that. I just wanted to let you know it was an accident.", Simon rambled on, already nervous as ever.

Raphael watched him and shushed him, shaking his head. "It was an accident, Simon. I know.", he turned away from him and moved to his usual table, sitting down. Simon followed after him with his head down, flustered and playing with his fingers. Simon took a seat as well but was confused as Raphael was glaring at him. He raised a brow. "Uh.. What?"  
"What do you mean 'what'? I'm supposed to get a free coffee, right? So, where is it?"

Simon's eyes went wide. He seemed angrier than usual. Or, he was just getting that vibe from him. Simon nodded hurriedly and rushed off to prepare his coffee, chewing his lip. He hurriedly made it and avoided eye contact with Clary, who was watching him. He grabbed a Sharpie and back to the table, sitting in his chair. He uncapped it and spelled Raphael's name, the right way this time.  
He quietly pushed it to him and kept his head to the ground, capping the pen. "Thank you. It's spelled correctly... for once.", he muttered, his eyebrows furrowed as he took a sip. Simon nodded, looking to him. "Uh.. Is everything okay? You look a little.. angry.", Simon asked, not wanting to invade anything.

Raphael's eyes went a little wide and he shook his head. "Nothing. It's not something I want to talk about..", he told him. Simon nodded and tapped the pen against the table. "That's okay, you don't have to if you don't want t-", he was interrupted by Raphael bursting into a rant. "It's just that today hasn't been my day. I woke up late as hell, I basically had to force my roommates to stay quiet throughout the night so I could barely sleep but when I did, it overslept. I'm hungry, I need to eat, and now I'm here with you. I have every right to be pissed.", Raphael told him, causing Smon to sit with his mouth a little wide.

Simon then smiled, looking at him. "Y'know.. you're not very good at keeping your personal feelings a secret. Even I'm better at doing so and I never shut up.", Simon told him, laughing softly. Raphael looked at Simon and tried his best to hide his forming smile but failed as he began to laugh along with him. "Shut up.", Raphael told him, shaking his head, trying to cover his face. They both laughed for a bit and began to talk, time passing them by.

Both shared plenty laughs while they spoke, learning more about another than anyone ever could. Simon had taken note to Raphael's mention of hunger, offering him free pastries. As the two continued to talk, Raphael couldn't believe that Simon was the leader of his own band and Simon couldn't believe that Raphael had never seen Back to The Future. All of them. In that moment, Simon was sure that he could have lost all interest for Raphael.

"What do you mean you've never seen Back to The Future!? It's a classic but the rest of them are not as good as its' first, I might add.", he yelled, causing the whole shop to look at the both of the. He blushed and reassured everyone before turning back to Raphael. 

Time continued to pass and Simon had completely forgotten about his break being over. It was clear that Clary didn't take any offense to it or else she would have stopped the both of them. Raphael moved to take a bite into the blueberry pastry, getting blue jelly onto his face. Simon looked to Raphael's cheek and began to laugh, leaving Raphael in confusion. He moved to get the jelly off with his thumb, eating it off. Raphael would forever deny it but he definitely blushed once Simon had did it. Both had sat in silence for a moment, looking at each other with a grin on their faces.

However, it was interrupted as Raphael got an alert on his phone. His face dropped and he immediately stood up. He looked to Simon who was already concerned. "Is.. Is everything okay?", Simon asked, looking to him. Raphael nodded quietly. "Yeah, I just.. I have to go.", Raphael finished his coffee and left it on the table, running out of the shop and into the streets. Simon frowned and sighed, immediately wondering what he could have done wrong or who it was on the other side of the phone.

Maybe it was his boyfriend. Or worse, girlfriend. Maybe he was just pretending something was wrong to get away from Simon. His desire to work had left him, causing him to take off his apron. His head was down as he moved back behind the counter and to the back of the shop. He sat down on top of the crates, rubbing at his eyes. _Did I do something wrong? Something definitely looked wrong. Dammit, Simon. Why did I even try? I should have just left him alone. He's only a customer after all and he would never go for someone like me.._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> simon pls :(( you're so pure that made me so sad wow but the next chapter will be really sad so.. i suggest you prepare? or maybe you love the pain? who knows? but seriously tears will flow i'll send tissues 
> 
> i'm sorry for making yall wait :( love yall, thank you for your patience


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